Fighting In Darkness

Tonight, I sit alone discovering myself. I fight the dark thoughts of death and self-hatred with fantasies of others creation. The delight of a heartfelt story to drown out my despairs in reminiscent emotions. I look back at my life as a child flipping through a picture book. The images of what has passed haunt me like cruel poltergeist, taunting my soul. The pain rages within in me some days, some night, quieted only by the man that chooses to continue to love me unconditionally. He strives for me to just live. Is it true that now I may have a future? That everything that was once so consistent will no longer come to pass? I believe I may be hoping this to be true, for the first time. My man is becoming the greatest of them all. Fighting for me, like any real man should for the beloved. How sweet and strong he is. Holding so tightly to the weak life I am. So as I sit here pondering what the future may hold, I wish to dream of the future we are.