Being With People

I found out today I can't remember how. I wonder if I ever really have. It made me so sad. I don't feel normal. What ever that means. When I look back most of my memories are covered in pain. I feel like crying. Am I even human? Some one who only knows abuse as love? They say that's not true, that that isn't love, if it hurts...then why did they say that? what is...real love.....i  thought I knew...

How To Live

Today I've found I'm not myself. I don't know is i ever was. Broken. Forever. But maybe I have worth. I was told today by a stranger, some one I barely know, that I do. I don't know what to think about it. I can't process it, really. How do I deal? I do I survive? How do I live....